Today....

The dim lit bar, drunkards and the rickety stairs... almost everything around was depressing... And I added to it.

Every customer was precious to her. Regular customers got a hi-five or a hug over the counter or a loud bye, Newbies were given a warm and broad smile making them feel comfortable and Random people, like me, went unnoticed (atleast that's what I thought). Each order she took she delivered perfectly. No one cribbed, yelled or complained at her. Her smile maybe did it all.

I kept observing her failing to notice that she did too. Observant, empathetic and expressive is how I can best describe her. She remembered to ask about how the interview was to a 30 year old man who must have visited the bar day before. She reacted listening to one of the customer when he described how the trial went, a pursuit for getting his land back. Everyone was greeted with the same warmth and smile.

I got up from my chair in the dining area and walked towards the bar. At that very moment she came out of the kitchen and handed the bowl of fries to a person standing next to me. She looked at me & asked, "Refill your glass with cognac,sir?' My brows went up, she knew,

"What if I want to change my drink?", I tried to irritate her.

With no change in her demeanour, "After 5 drinks, that is not advisable. But as you wish. What will you have then, sir?"

'5 drinks', I thought. She knew what I was drinking and how many had I already had but surprisingly none of them were served by her. Then how did she know?

"Repeat the cognac, please"

She refilled my glass with the same radiance & warm smile on her face. I stared right into her.

Why was she different? I couldn't reason that out. What is that I do different at home that she is so much different there? The 'is' changes to 'was' I mentally made a note. She no longer was mine. Two signatures did it all today afternoon. I had to go back to the room today to an empty bed. All alone. What would she do? Where would she go? She was alone to. At least that's what I chose to believe.

I took my glass, shot the drink down in one go, banged the glass back on the counter and left.

I waited outside on the street checking my watch time and again. The bar was closing and I waited for her to walk out. After the goodbyes and kisses to her colleagues, she turned to find me there.

"Come... Let's go", I said.

Her expression changed her eyes turned watery. Was it the chill of the night or me?

"Where to?", she enquired. Her voice began to crack.

"Home"
"Our ways are different now"
"Do you've a place to go?"
"I'll find one"
"It's too late in the night to find a place to stay. Till you find a safe place to stay you stay with me"

She tried refuting, fighting her tears back but all I could hear were mumbles. Before she could word them I said,
"I might not be your husband any more. But still am a person you can trust. Someone whom you know. You can stay with me than at some random place"

And our conversation ended there. She nodded & we started walking... On the same road, crossing the same buildings at the same time... like we did in these 3 years...

Things were now going to change. Every minute of this change I dread...